Going Radical Fourth month!

We started this year and named it "the year of going radical" this was the year we were going to reign in our finances and clean up our bad investment debt and student loan debt (thanks Dave Ramsey). April was the month I wanted our student loans to be paid off. We crunched the numbers and this was a far fetched, but if going truly radical, a goal we could achieve. As unexpected things would come up I would worry/complain about not reaching our goal month. I literally would visualize me in a dark tunnel and running to the small light in the distance the closer I would get to the light the harder I would run, leaving the tunnel meant I was debt free. I could smell the fresh air, see the blue skies and look at the beautiful flowers outside the tunnel, I would be free!! Free to spend our hard earned money, free to focus on other financial pursuits.

Well we paid it off, early in the month to boot! I have a our third "You are paid in full" notice hanging on the wall in our bedroom. I wept when Benjamin sent me the email notice that said our balance was zero. I played my motivational song, the song I think about as I leave my tunnel.

This euphoria lasted about 24 hours. I felt on top of the world, like we had run our race and that it was awesome! Sadly after my 24 hour high was up I came out of my tunnel only to see that in order to get to the top of the mountain I had to enter another tunnel! This tunnel (the 2nd mortgage that had the brunt of all the failed homestead plans) was huge, almost 4 X what we had just paid off. I felt so discouraged! How could we sustain this kind of momentum? When looking at the money we had already used I couldn't help but look around and see all the things I would rather spend that money on. My duct tape couch, named that because it has been "repaired" with duct tape. My dinning table that is on stilts because the thrift store chairs we bought for it were too tall, my kids mattresses that are on the floor because I have not gotten them a proper bed frame... all of these "wants" just kept creeping in to my happy accomplishment. Had we done the right thing? Should we have used our money in other more tangible ways? Or should we have put the  money towards the larger mountain? My mother has always said that self doubt is one of Satan's largest tools. I think ingratitude is another one. How could we accomplish so much and I feel so unsatisfied? I was talking to Benjamin about it this morning of why I wasn't more happy with accomplishing this goal,  he quoted to me a line from The Family: A Proclamation "Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ." (https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation) It doesn't say happiness is most likely to be achieved when paying off debt, or running a wonderful race, it comes when our priorities are in line with what Heavenly Fathers. He wants us to become a follower of his son Jesus Christ, where charity and love trump all goals.

When my twin and I ran our first and only marathon there was a part in the race in the very beginning where we ran through a tunnel, it felt really long because it was dark and all uphill. When we came out of that tunnel there was 24 miles of race still to run! Mostly hills, beautiful desert landscape and nothing but runners solitude to sustain you. Thinking on this financial race that we have signed up for I need to remember the path is long, the path is difficult, but it is my job to not focus on the end so much, but try to enjoy being out of the tunnel, breathing and seeing the the charity and love that others offer as well as what I can offer along the way. 

Lessons learned in April: 

1."Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ."

Parkin's seven year old scavenger hunt! May 3rd!

Our loving little boy turned seven yesterday!  Benjamin and I had so much fun putting this scavenger hunt family party together. We started with giving him some sunglasses "that weren't no dollar store pair" and asked him to go to the place that sold cheap items there. We went to the dollar store where all the kids picked up a pair of flip flops and Parkin got his next clue. That clue took us to the Clark's house where his clue was waiting for him by their bee hive in their backyard. The bees also gave Parkin peanut M&M's thoughtful bees!  We then were lead to McCormick park for our next clue. We played at the park for a bit and were on our way to Collin's house for our next clue. We passed by Ft. Lowell park and had to swing in to show Benjamin the neat oasis the kids and I had found. They had tadpoles there the size of small cuties! After a little hike around that park we were back on the road to the Holman's house. Our next clue lead us to McDonald's for a happy meal lunch. The clue at Mc'd's told us to go to Nana and Papa's pool. We swam and had a blast. Nana made delicious cupcakes and Parkin got some awesome presents including a Pokemon movie which we watched later. Another clue took us to Grandma Bab's and Granpa Ronnie's place for a present, legos!  Lastly we went home for dinner and a movie and to build legos. Geezz that was a lot of driving and a lot of fun! At each stop he got a gift mostly themed around Pokemon stuff. He was very grateful and I think he had a great time, the whole family really loved the adventure.

Parkin we love you! You light up a room just by breathing! You are super smart, one of the classes you have taken this year is Mandarin. You speak it really well and have learned to write it as well. I love it when randomly you can see Mandarin characters at the grocery store or dollar store and know the meaning of it. You like to test military families and returned missionaries who have learned Mandarin to see if they know what you know :) You are crazy loyal and will not allow others to be picked on. You stand up for friends, family and anyone you feel is being picked on. You have courage and compassion a beautiful combination! Son I love you and thank my lucky stars the I get to be your Mom!

Bella become a teenager! March 8th!

How did this event not get posted?! Bella has had the privilege of going to several Bar and Bat Mitzvah this year. They are large, fun, expensive and spiritual coming of age parties for Jewish teenagers. I remember as a teenager wanting to go to one of these parties, Bella that lucky/popular girl has gone to 3! Well in honor of us going radical her party would hopefully be one of these attributes, fun! Even as I am typing this my super positive girl said mom it was fun, gotta love her. It started out with Bella going out with Benjamin with donuts with Dad, instead of donuts for breakfast she chose getting a cheeseburger. The ladies went shopping we gave her some money and she used some of her own. But her biggest gift was Bella getting her own room. Dieter moved out and Bella moved in, I think on the same day! We had grand parents over for her favorite dinner cheeseburgers and cheesy noodles. Cheeseburgers all day makes Bella a happy girl. Bella we love you we think you are amazing! You are smart right now in school you are taking English, Spanish, Biology, Physics, Chemistry, Algebra II, History, Logic, and PE (my favorite). You are athletic. You are friendly. You are perceptive. You are kind. This last one is a gift that usually takes most people time to develop but even from a young age when kids are naturally egocentric you were not, you have always reached out and you continue to do so. What a great Christ like attribute. Thanks for teaching me everyday, laughing with me everyday being my daughter and friend, I love you Bella! Next year we will have a Mormanitzva, its where Mormons celebrate the coming of age of being allowed to go to church dances! It will be big (multiple stakes can go). It will be fun (sober fun the best kind). It will not be expensive(a ward will provide the refreshments and decorations and venue/ the church building)! It will be a coming of age spiritual party (since you will move into the Mia maid program at church). This party will be epic almost as epic as getting your own room! Love you Bella!

March Madness! Going Radical Third Month

This month was crazy. We had put together a very radical birthday package for Sister Bekah Howe. I say it was really radical because it was not expensive but hopefully fun. We put together a candy card using candy titles to write a letter to our favorite sister missionary. Unfortunately March was very busy and we did not get it out to her in the month of February her birthday month, so finally I remembered to take it to the post office 10 minutes before it was closing, I didn't want another day to pass by. Olivia and I jump in the car and we race off to try to make it. I had just gone through the light on 22nd and Kolb hit the gas and I heard the whirling sound of a police car. Yikes, I knew exactly what I had done, speeding.

So needless to say we did not make it to the post office. I was cited for not having my registration and received a ticket. I was clocked at going 11 miles over. Not ten, but eleven so the price of the ticket goes up by $40. Not very radical. My inexpensive present was climbing in cost. Since I hadn't gotten a ticket in many years I could sign up to take the defensive driving class. I put this off to the very last possible moment. So much so that I wasn't sure I could still take the class. I was suppose to sign up 7 days before the report date on my ticket and unfortunately I was calling the city because it was exactly 7 days if I counted the current date. I didn't want to pay for the class if it was going to be too late so I was on hold to talk to a city worker.

I was on hold for 45 minutes, no joke. It took so long I loaded up the car to go to my Friday  kick boxing class and figured the music would be loud enough that having the phone on speaker wouldn't be distracting. Luckily the phone operator came on the line. I gave him my citation number and asked if it was too late to take the class. He then told me I was cited for not having my vehicle registration and all I had to do was take in a copy of my registration and the fee would be dismissed. I then asked about the speeding ticket, he said there was no speeding ticket. I told him but on my ticket it says that I was eleven over the speed limit. He told me that it does say that but that I wasn't cited for speeding. I asked him why not. He said I had a nice cop. Bless that wonderful cop! It was not in the radical budget. What a merciful cop.

Its a good thing, because my wonderful sisters surprised me with a birthday trip to Colorado!! I was sitting down to dinner on a Wednesday night. Lindsey was on the phone with me at dinner. She asked me if I believed in miracles. I said yes. She said say it out loud, say you believe in miracles. I laughed and said it out loud. She then asked me to check under my seat at the dinner table. I said ok, just to appease her not thinking much about it. To my shock there was something taped under the chair! I pull it off and read that it is a plane ticket for Thursday evening to fly to Colorado. A weekend getaway! It was unexpected and so much fun! We ate out, went to an awesome art exibet and musical presentation, a pine wood derby race, and the Denver temple. I love visiting my sisters I find that when I visit I get to see what awesome mothers they are. Hillary has great kids and she is a fantastic mom. I always leave wanting to copy something. March was a wonderful month!

Lessons learned in March:

1)Every unexpected win-fall goes to the goal! This month Benjamin got a small bonus, it is always fun to get more money, right! Sticking to our goal it did not even cross our mind to spend it on anything but our debt. Don't give in! Remember show your control so he can show you HIS control over everything.

2) Expect good things to happen! I was convinced the motorcycle cop was a "little devil leprechaun." I didn't think it would all work out. In fact I got very worked up about it, wailing and gnashing my teeth. It actually was quit pathetic how upset I got. "I don't have money for a ticket! This is not right! (Even though speeding is not right!) "Going radical never works out!  I cried and yelled about it. So to hear the news that I didn't have to pay, to hear the news that I had a surprise trip planned, wow good things can happen!!!

Going Radical! Second Month!

The second month proved to be harder. Unexpected expenses popped up which made sticking to the budget extremely difficult. I seriously debated whether I was going to purchase my Costco card again. I know the prices are cheaper there but that initial membership fee always gets me. During Christmas time, I  used the bonus check they give you when you spend a certain amount, so membership fee was due, ugg $100 grocery money gone. It was a hard toss up whether to renew or not.  I could buy yeast packets for $1.50 at Fry's or an entire package of yeast at Costco which contains well over 40 helpings of yeast for $4.99. The same applies to  other baking products, and cleaning products. We faced another unexpected challenge with a $90 registration fine for missing registration for one of our vehicles, we had it but there was a mix-up with the county and it fell on our responsibility. My vacuum needed to be replaced. Benjamin had repaired that thing at least ten times, he brought it back to life on multiple occasions, she gave all she could but this momma needed something reliable for preschool. The carpet must be clean. So money had to go to buying a new one. I remember talking to my sister Lindsey saying I don't have money for this! She said, "Lesley do you really not have money for this? 10 years ago we both did not have two nickels to rub together is it like that or do you just not want to spend the money?"  It was the latter, I didn't want to buy it not because I didn't have the money but because every dollar spent on something besides my debt brings me down. I only bought a cheap $50 vacuum that hopefully will last the year, fingers crossed arms folded. When every penny is labeled it is much harder when unexpected things come up and when you have very little wiggle room every penny is appreciated. Luckily nothing required us to dip into the emergency fund or use a credit card.

 Lesson learned during February:

1) When you spend too much in one pay cycle it does not mean the next pay cycle needs to be over. Don't get into "its another drop in the bucket" mentality! We blew the budget mine as well buy the new couch, no my friend, my duct tape couch will not be replaced until the student loan is paid off!

2) I said previously how important it is for husband and wife to be on the same page, for the children to know your financial goals. Well I am extending the information to friends and extended family. The more people that know the better you will be able to stick to your goal. they will look out for you on good deals and not tempt you with enticing activities. When I ran my first (and last) marathon I told everyone that I knew that I was going to run it, it kept me accountable because I didn't want to be a drop quitter.

3) This month I really felt the Lord magnify our efforts in trying to keep in a budget, the gas for the cars seemed to last a little bit longer. The more you notice His hand in your life the more you will see how He is there guiding you.

Another month down, we can do this, I am praying for a miracle in April, please join me!

Going Radical! First Month!

2014 is the year of the Radical! We are big Dave Ramsey fans, he is a financial adviser that specializes in helping motivate people to get out of debt. He has a 7 step path to financial freedom. The first step is establish an emergency fund of $1,000 dollars. Step two is snowball your debt. Start with the lowest debt no matter the interest rate pay if off then take the amount you were paying to that debt and apply it to the next debt "snowball" that amount until that sucker picks up steam and rolls all the way down hill to knock out you last debt. Going radical means that you are willing to sacrifice wants and sometimes needs (amazing how needs have a way of diminishing) to fulfill your greatest desire to get out of debt!

We have no credit card debt, no car loans, no Christmas or vacation debt. We do have land debt ( when we sold our land in Benson we had to sell it at a loss, we took out a loan from our 401K to pay the difference, ouch!) We have a student loan (Benjamin had been working full time in college but that last year he needed to not be distracted with juggling both full time jobs so we took a loan to pay for our living expenses while he finished up). Lastly the true beast our home equity loan ( this is what we used to pay the permit fees for said land, put in a well, dig trenches for said well, trenches for electrical lines, inspection fees, clearing of land for home site, architect fees, county fees, paying off a car etc) this little loan is the monkey nay the gorilla on our back.

Before 2014 I had been preparing the kids for a change in life style. Not that we have been extravagant in the past, but we did occasionally eat out, we always had big birthday parties and went on family trips a couple of times a year. This would all change.

Going radical means cash flowing everything. Every dollar has a name. I have three envelopes 1) grocery money 2) gas money 3) money left over after paying bills that is not going to be applied to the debt. Once these envelopes are empty, spending ceases till next paycheck.  In the past I have done this but I have often cheated dipping into my checking account with my debit card. This will not happen in the year of the radical!

Well we have finished our first month and I have learned some valuable lessons, not in a particular order:

1) A couple must be united in this approach, when one is weak the other must be strong! When all you want to do is order pizza but the cash allotted for that is gone, one must say not in the budget lets make pancakes instead.

2) Its a family affair but kids lack the perspective that adults have gained over the years. This can be very challenging when they want something but it is not in the budget. Guilt can be very hard, one must constantly visualize the feeling of being debt free. And pray for strength!

3) Pay your tithing! Dave Ramsey is an Evangelical Christian he also believes in paying 10 percent of ones income. Before he learned sound budgeting he had learned the hard way how to control his budget. He and his wife had to file for bankruptcy even during that time he paid his tithing. Because tithing isn't about the money. God is God he does not need money. Heavenly Father wants to develop in us a willing/grateful heart (among other things) and paying tithing does this. When you allow yourself to be a giver He can than "open up the windows of heaven and pour out a blessing on you."

4) Windows are WIDE open! In order to cash flow my daughters braces I needed a certain amount of preschool tuition to be paid in full (they get a discount by doing so) and it was! We were even able to pay off our land loan in January, five months early!

5) When you show self control, Heavenly Father shows you His control of the entire universe. He truly will bless your righteous desires. In the past  we would have celebrated this big event with a specific cake from Costco, a chocolate bundt cake (http://www.howelesismore.blogspot.com/2009/01/never-say-never.html).  I told the kids we paid off the land on Wednesday January 29 and they instantly said lets go buy a cake. But sticking to our envelops plan I knew the money still in the envelops was designated for something else. They were of course really let down but  I was determined, but sad see #2. Benjamin goes to church with Dieter for a special youth night for the young men. At the end of the evening he comes home and says you are never going to believe what I got at church tonight he then shows me the exact bundt cake from Costco! Dieter said this is a true radical cake, free! Benjamin said the stake young men's president said we had an extra cake and thought your family would like it. Are your kidding me!!! Benjamin said to add to this tender mercy was the fact that the youth activity's theme was Heavenly Father knows each of us individually! Heavenly father knew we had a righteous goal of getting out of debt, he knew what we normally would have celebrated with and he new who had an extra one.  See lesson #4!

Boom baby onto month number 2!

Benjamin turns 37!

Benjamin turned 37! All this man wanted for his birthday was pizza, homemade sugar cookies, and to watch the Cats play. Well, he got a lot more! The girls made him this awesome photo collage of the family, Parkin took a sharpie to a plastic baseball bat and decorated it for him, and Holman carved a key out of soap with his pocket knife. I bought him conversation hearts 3 bags I might add, we went to see the Saratov Approach with friends and we went out afterwards to one of his favorite restaurants, Claim Jumper. Our friends gave him a DQ card, what a lucky guy he is! I was super sad that the Cats lost, they really could have brought home the the perfect birthday for my hubs, he took the loss pretty well though :)

One of Benjamin's best qualities is his excitement for things, he loves his birthday, any celebration really. He does the countdown and gets everybody fired up. It is really endearing :) He knows how to play. I couldn't find him on Friday night I went to the front yard and there he was playing a game of soccer with our kids and some of the neighborhood kids. He is the fun Dad. At the park he helps organize the games that every kid wants to be in on. He is a good provider, he often gets awards for going above and beyond and being a team leader who is recognized for getting along with people who can be difficult. He actively tries his best at being Bishop, I am not gonna lie it can be challenging (at least for me and the kids) but he wouldn't change a thing in being able to see the power of the atonement in peoples lives. And dang he is good-looking, yep I think I will keep him around for another 37!