Don't judge a book by its smiling cover

Today I went to the library with Holman, Parkin, Adrianna and their cousin Jared. We headed to the little kids section where Parkin literally took every puzzle apart and was climbing shelves. Holman was playing on the computer and I was trying to discreetly nurse Anna. Jared was helpful he would bring all the puzzle pieces and together we were putting them back together. Finally after I was done nursing and finished reading the boys requests, I was able to really start to clean up Parkins hurricane mess with two hands. We had about five more minutes before we needed to go, and our area was clean, so I told the boys we could read one more book. We sat down in the little semi circle benches they have, they are low to the floor and padded on one side and the other side of the bench is just wood. Holman and Jared were sitting side by side on one bench holding baby Anna and doing a good job I might add. Parkin was on the backside of the bench looking over the boys with a huge smile. All four kiddos were being so well behaved I was so impressed. Then I noticed a lady looking at us intently, I am thinking she must be admiring how well I am manging this brood, or she must really like my reading voice, bottom line she is impressed. Then she politely stops me, I brace myself for the impending compliment, wait for it - wait for it. Then she tells me, "mam your son doesn't have any underwear on and he isn't wearing pants." I quickly go to the other side of the bench to find Parkin completely naked from the waist down. His excited expression at me wasn't because he was enjoying the book, it was because he was mooning the people behind him. Awesome.

Random Holidays

I wanted my baby to be born in November with the exception of two days, Thanksgiving and black friday. So what does my little independent girl do? She starts to come after Thanksgiving dinner just in time for black friday. But like a good girl she lets her mom finish her chocolate dessert. Bella was born on the national day of the woman, Liv was born on boxing day, so to fit in with our girl trio she was born on black friday, should have known. Like a true daughter of mine there was lots of drama involved, to get full details read Benjamin's blog (plus he has pictures)
http://www.howeuben.blogspot.com/ .

One of the lessons I thought I learned in 2009 was not to take things for granted ( the small pleasures of life, water, electricity, the ability to get a loan etc.) but I missed a great one the ability to conceive and deliver without incident. My heart goes out to friends and family who have had this harsh trial, and now I know with a little measure what you have experienced, all I can say is I have a new found empathy and when I say a prayer in your behalf, it runs a little deeper.

Thanks to all who have prayed for our pretty little Adrianna, there is a cute country song with that title, can't get it out of my head :)

Thanks again.

Yes I Want Some Cheese With My Whine

Well its the 17th and I have 17 more days till my due date. All I can say is bring it! At the beginning of my pregnancy as my belly was growing, Parkin my two and half year old, would look at my tummy and say, "What happen to you." Then I would say you and your three siblings "happen to me." So months later he would pull my shirt up (hopefully not in the grocery store) and say "baby happen to you."

I have two sisters who both have five children and both of them for their fifth pregnancies they went into labor 3 weeks early. Obviously I am following in their footsteps with the number of kids so why can't I go early like them! Wow what a whiner I am. I know it and sadly everyone around me knows it! Last week at my appointment the nurse suggested support hose for my swollen legs, what am I eighty now?! No I am just 37 1/2 weeks preganant (yes i am counting in halfs, just like a five year old would do). I am consuming antacids at an alarming rate. Am I really going to be on my 3rd bottle of antacids? Ok I am finished now with my rant..........deep breath.

It is time to give up my hope of having a November baby, what does a couple of days mean anyway? So we will have three kids born in December, so what if my grandfather said " Gees what are those kids doing in March." What can I say my grandpa is smart and can do the math. Yikes I can't believe I wrote that, oh wait yes I can I am a hormonal pregnant lady and hopefully soon I will be a postpartum lady, sweet the excuses keep coming!!!

I thought I was done complaining?! I guess not...... Parkin now pulls up my shirt and points at my belly butten and says "baby hurt" no that would be "mommy hurt" to which I will reply get over it Lesley! "Cowboy up" and "Git er done".....in 17 days.

It's only a phase......

My sister in law Robin has brought comfort to me with the phrase "its just a phase" this applies to anything that drives you batty that your children do. They will eventually grow out of it. Sleeping through the night, sucking on their thumb, pull-ups, saying a phrase that you dislike, eventually the phase will pass and you look back with gratitude over the change.

Three weeks ago we potty trained Parkin. I woke up on a Monday morning done with buying diapers and thinking that we would soon have an infant to buy diapers for. We used the three day potty trainng method that my friend Alison introduced us to when we potty trained Holman. The first day it was so exciting for him to get a few chocolate chips for his good work. Drop by drop he recieved his reward. The next day our excitment alone was reward for him. I marveled that on day four he would quietly go into the bathroom and do his buisness without any cheering or assistance. We are talking about not just peeing, the real fun stuff no parent wants to have happen in his underwear, he succesfully emptied it in the toilet. Love this phase!!! (Potty training to me is a huge dichotomy, on one hand it is so fustrating! But when it is done effectiviely and their little face lights up because they get it and they know you are so pleased with them it melts my heart).

Sadly like bad phases that stop, good ones do to, why does it have to work both ways?!! A week later I found myself cleaning underwear and mourning the loss of "quietly doing his business phase." Isn't it the same way with adults? We develop good habits, get excited over our accomplishments and then suddenly you realize that you aren't doing it anymore and your good phase has turned into a slacker phase. I guess I can't expect anything different from little people.

Knowing that everything is a phase makes me want to truly bask in those good phases, I would name some of them right now but I fear by typing it or saying it outloud means that that phase will soon turn. So I will take my mental note of the phases that I am enjoying in my children s lives and my own and take a snapshot to remember knowing all good things change and luckily all bad things do as well.

Side note, Parkin has again taken to putting his yucky in the potty only he doesn't quietly do it, he wants me there, fine by me. That is a phase I will gladly appreciate, given thee alternative :)

Live chicken or canned poultry

Well the chickens are gone. After much deliberation and waying their worth and work we were more than happy to give them to friends of ours in the ward who were looking to start up a flock. Holman alone was sad, he said he liked everything about them except for when he stepped in their poop. I don't think he remembers all the times I asked him to collect the eggs followed by growning. I talked to the girls about how they felt about not having anymore chickens, Bella said, "frankly I feel like a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders." I think that is how every parent feels when a family pet finds a new home, they may miss them but the weight of having yet another responsibility is lifted.

So in another effort to become self reliant and be more prepared Benjamin and I have started pressure canning. We have canned a ton of chicken for way less than you can buy it even at Costco. We have canned chicken, steak, beans and potatoes. Canning is great because if the power goes out the food in the freezer won't last years like the canned products do. With canned products you don't have to reconstitute anything. The steak is particularly very yummy with very little prep the family can be eating stroganoff in less than 20 mins. Now that's my kind of meal prep!




This was the fruits of our productive Saturday, we are awesome.

I've got spirit, yes I do, I've got spirit, how bout you!

I have always had mixed emotions about spirit week at school, when lots of kids participate and you have a great look it can be lots of fun. But...... when there is nobody dressed up it is like wearing a Halloween costume to school on the 30th. I remember in the first grade it was cowboy day for spirit week and my mother who is the queen of costumes had "the perfect outfit." I had a vest, bandanna, pigtails, jeans and knowing my mother probably even chaps. But that was not enough, my mother also drew in freckles on my face. I remember thinking I already have a boat load of freckles why is she drawing on more? That was a long day at school.

Then there was the time in middle school when Lindsey and I dressed up for Halloween in the seventh grade, I guess it wasn't cool to do so because when my sister Hillary pulled up to the middle school parking lot and we saw no one dressed up we begged her to take us home. Why would she do that, when she could tell us to get out of the car, it would be alright and while giving us this uplifting speech lay on the horn so everybody would stop and stare? Priceless. To make matters worse Hillary and her friend were dressed up as Hari Krishna's (yeah look it up) complete with bald wigs. What did they care they were seniors in high school. Seventh grade, we all remember middle school!

Yesterday Bella announced that starting Monday it would spirit week at school, and that tomorrow would be mismatched day, she started planning her outfit. But when she awoke this morning "she couldn't remember" if it was actually spirit week so she opted not to dress up. Olivia on the other hand was very excited about being mismatched. She chose a neon colored long sleeved cowgirl shirt with camouflage shorts and mismatched shoes. She was feeling good. When we were leaving the house to catch the bus she mentioned that her teacher never announced spirit week, I began to feel nervous for her. When we got to the school bus stop I noticed that no one else was dressed up. Yes it would have been smart to have her pack other clothes or at least have a spare shoe, so her shoes could be matching. When she was leaving the car I told her she could call me for anything that she may need at school today....I didn't tell her directly to call if she was the only one dressed up, because at this point she didn't notice she was looking odd. Hopefully I planted a rescue seed. After I drove away I called Suzie (yes I should have called her first) to see if it was spirit week she said it was for the middle school but not sure if it was for the primary school. If it wasn't for the primary school then Livvey has joined the ranks of "Spirit Week" victims. Have you been a spirit week victim? If so, do share :)

Update: I asked Liv how her day went she said it was great. I asked how many kids in her class dressed up, she said none. Lets hear it for independence.

Your gonna want to plug your nose

Soccer season has officially begun, and since Holman said, "Mom soccer is my sport" we thought we would give this sport a try. Unfortunately Livvey and Bella are on different teams so I have three practices to take kids to. Luckily there is only one park in the town of Benson population 5,000, so I don't have to coordinate locations just time. Holman and Jared are on the same team, their team consists of five players, the other three players have already played on a team before (when did they start at 2?). The games are quite fun to watch, three on three, no need for a goalie, parents are just happy if they make a goal in the right direction. Bella and Sydney are on the Blue Devils team they play seven on seven (unless the coach doesn't realize he has 8 players on the field, we went almost an entire game with one more player, don't feel bad for the other team they still won).

Sadly Liv doesn't have a cousin on her team, but don't feel bad for her, she has plenty of confidence. We were at the park playing on the swings waiting for the next practice to start, when Liv was off to the side by a tree. A cute little boy ran up to her and said, "Hi, Olivia." To which she replies, "Your gonna want to plug your nose, I have to fart." Then she let it rip. I was stunned waiting to see what the little boy would say or do. He just smiled and said, "Hey lets go down the slide" then they both ran off to play together. I was shocked never would I have admitted that that was what I was in the corner doing, much less to a boy and in the 1st grade. Later I talked to Liv about it and told her I was shocked that she told the boy her private business she said, "yeah I was shocked that I shared that too." Belle and I couldn't stop laughing about it, she said she would never have admitted that, and would have denied it at all costs, now that's more like me. But like Benjamin always says that girl is our spice.

(note I apologize for such a graphic description, I know some families never say the f**t word, to which I will reply, bless you.)

Our Three Phantoms

We have three phantoms:

1) A car that breaks down only when I am driving. Literally it is like the gas pedal has disappeared and I just have to kind of coast to safety.

2) We have a mysterious pipe leak in our Tucson home, don't you love paying for home maintenance (especially when you don't live there)? I think I could rent the rest of my life, let someone else take care of things, help them get rich, we are not meant for money.

3) The ghosts are back in our Tucson home as well. Our renters recently had the Ghost Busters come and take nightly pictures of the house to see if they could catch the apparitions, wow that sounds like a Scooby Do episode.

Fun times.

My mantra this week: "There is nothing like fear for distorting perspective, and nothing like gratitude for restoring it."


I am grateful my car phantom only works part time. I am grateful that i don't have to live with a leaky pipe. And I am grateful the ghosts stayed in Tucson, I guess they are too good for a double wide :)

A Toast to Preference

I cook, I clean, I do laundry, I drive here and there, I tutor, I listen and pay attention, I am a nurse, I am a cheerleader, I am a soft place to fall, I am a mother.

I have a few minor requests. One of the kids chores is to set the table. Finally, I stated a want of my own (notice I didn't say need), I requested that the cup that is set above my plate be a glass one.

I do not like plastic cups, so sue me. If given the choice I will choose a glass cup to drink from every time. If I am at a friends or relatives house and they hand me a plastic cup I will not think twice about it. In my own home where I know that the sturdy glass cup awaits I will reach for it every time.

So now when the kids set the table they always say something like, "Don't forget to get the princess her glass cup" or "you know who wont drink from a plastic cup". I admit once I stated my request I made fun of it too, like "looks like someone doesn't know the difference between glass and plastic" and then of course the kids would groan. Everyone is welcome to drink from a glass cup at my table, kids included its just a better way to live, I mean drink.

As for being a princess, I don't know many princesses who would tolerate ten months of port-a-potty use with limited electricity and water. I guess sleeping in a lumpy bed full pf peas would not phase me, but dinning on a delicious meal only to toast it of with a plastic cup would sure make me turn up my nose.

What is your princess/prince preference? (not your cup preference per se, but preferences in general).

First day of school and bag of love

Here are some pics of the kids first day of school. Bella is in the 3rd grade now and has enjoyed her first week so far. She loves meeting up with her cousin Sydney at recess and before and after school to play.



































Olivia is in the first grade and is pretty much a live version of Junie B Jones (a children's book series about a precocious little girl). When I went shopping with Liv to get school clothes and a new back pack, I realized she had a very specific vision of what she wanted her pack back to be. We ended up at Ross in the purse section so she could pick a large handbag for her back pack. My little six year old insisted on carrying a black leather-like ladies handbag. It was the same price as Bella's "normal" backpack and I figure if it helps her self esteem to carry that, it was ok with me. Benjamin was beside himself with her choice, he couldn't help but smile and say that girl is our spice.







































Holman's first day of school he insisted on wearing this




















Overalls that were two sizes too small, without a t-shirt and with a cowboy hat. I told him that wasn't going to work so he compromised with throwing his robe on. What a team player.




















I did manage for him to put on a regular shirt and cut the overalls so now their overall shorts. Parkin hasn't really noticed their absence but likes to be a part of the picture process.

A whole lot of ugly going on

Oh my we went to Breakers Water Park with our good friends. We had a great time, but boy was there a whole lot of ugly going on. The swimsuits or lack thereof were amazing. I just had to make a list of top ten questions about my experience.

10) Why is it that little chested women somehow think it is attractive to flaunt the lack of cleavage they have? Sweetie just because it isn't there doesn't mean that others need to know for a certainty that it is not.

9) How is it that parents let there little girls run around in little "band aid" bikini's? Come on mom, you wouldn't let your son run around in a thong, would you?

8) Why is it that all the female lifeguards choose to wear a two piece?I am pretty sure having that extra piece of fabric in the middle will not make you go slower in the water.

7) Why is it that as a society we find it acceptable to have teenagers who are "life" guards. I mean we are putting our trust in a generation that is barely aloud to operate a moving vehicle, and has higher insurance because their reflexes are not quite developed and they sometimes make reckless choices ( i remember). The human brain is not fully developed until after the teenage years! With the economy being so bad can't we have the trickle down effect move its way to the swimming pool.

6) What is the purpose of a pornographic tattoo on your back, the person who has it can't even look at it!

5) Now time for a statement, tattoos are dumb and look trashy. "Mommy why do you have a boa constrictor wrapped around your leg and Tinkerbell flying around on your back? Cause mommy likes snakes and fairies.......

4) Are white bathing suits a good idea? No they are not

3) Is there really such a thing as the Hulk? Yes Benjamin and I saw this dude who had a severe upper body but apparently he didn't know where the leg weights were at the gym. Bless his chicken legs. (Hey I can't just rip on the ladies)

2) Were the waves that lame when I was a kid? I seriously remember giant waves that were awesome, is it a child's memory? Or have they cut down on the cost to run the waves and reduced its power consumption? How can I find that out?

1) And the biggest question that Benjamin and i talked about is................ What is it about the presence of water that brings people to practically wear nothing? It is not the sun that does that, people don't generally walk around parks on a hot day half naked. It is not like bathing suits are made like they were decades ago, they dry fast, so there is no need to reduce the amount of fabric being used...Why oh Why.

The views expressed in this blog represent a woman scorned by the banking industry and as such she is bitter about many things. She does promise to lighten up by weeks end.

Our new dog

We have a new dog. His name is Rocco, he is a mini doberman pinscher, or at least he looks like one. I told the kids the next dog we would get, wouldl be a small one, because we don't seem to do well with large dogs. The cool part is we don't have to feed him, he is our neighbor's dog, but visits often. We have been told Rocco's girlfriend lived in our place before we moved in, so he knows how to get through the fence. Rocco will also come to the front door and whine for Parkin to open it. Half the time nobody can hear him but Parkin, Parkin is half puppy so we know he speaks the language. For now the kids adore him, he really is a gentle dog, which is good for me because they have let up on their requests for their own dog.

This morning there was a huge rainbow so we jumped in the car real quick so we could drive to the end of the rainbow and get us a pot of gold. Rocco jumped in too, the kids tried to get him out, but were too nervous to chuck him out the door. I said shoot the neighbors don't know where he is half the time (I don't think they care) so lets take him with us. Yes the kids were concerned about me being taken to jail for doggy kidnapping. I told them I would explain to the officer that he is in our backyard more than he is in his own. They said that is true mom. Anyways we didn't make it to the end of the rainbow before it disappeared, the kids were disappointed but I explained that it is rare to get to the pot of gold, otherwise everybody would be walking around talking about their pot of Gold. Am I right?! (I don't know what Bella is doing with her toothbrush next to Rocco)

"The Lord giveth the Lord taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord"

The word of the Lord to Joseph Smith the Prophet, while he was a prisoner in the jail at Liberty, Missouri, March 1839.

Doctrine and Covenants 122:7-8

7 And if thou shouldst be cast into the ^apit, or into the hands of murderers, and the sentence of death passed upon thee; if thou be cast into the ^bdeep; if the billowing surge conspire against thee; if fierce winds become thine enemy; if the heavens gather blackness, and all the elements combine to ^chedge up the way; and above all, if the very jaws of ^dhell shall gape open the mouth wide after thee, know thou, my son, that all these things shall give thee ^eexperience, and shall be for thy good.

8 The ^aSon of Man hath ^bdescended below them all. Art thou greater than he?

Last week in Sunday School we talked about adversity and suffering. The one common thread that all humanity shares is having adversity in their lives and going through some sort of suffering. The discussion brought up that fact that when we go through adversity we learn something from it. Well if we all experience suffering and adversity and we all learn from it, than the world would have a bunch of enlightened people walking around. We know this isn't the case, so how do we learn something from our trials and not simply pass through them? Simple answer prayer.

We did not get our construction loan. We explained to our kids how we will be selling our land. It has been a rough year full of challenges. We wanted to learn from our experience and not just pass through it. I asked the kids (and hubby) to tell me something they had learned from living on the land.

Bella- "I think we became closer as a family, we had no walls to separate us. Also I now am BFF's with my cousin Sydney, because we lived out there we became real close."

Holman- "I learned that when you live in the desert, you can go pee anywhere."

Olivia- " I learned that when there is a peeing contest, you should never look." (Holman and cousin Jared J thought this was great fun, sorry Suzie if this is too much information).

Parkin- " I learned the best sleep is right between my mom and dad and I plan to sleep in between them until I am teenager". He didn't say anything, but I know he was thinking it.

Benjamin- " I learned that my wife and kids are tough and resilient, and can handle just about anything."

As for me, I learned, well too much to mention..... I do know this Heavenly Father does answer prayers, usually not how we expect.

I take comfort in the fact that my pioneer ancestors, settled in an area, layed down roots, planted a garden and before they could harvest it, they were driven from their homes (by a mob not unlike Flagstarr Bank, ok not even close) to start a new. And that is what we will do, lucky us we don't have to load a handcart and walk for miles, we get to settle in a double wide mansion.

Confessions of a Crappy Cook

As much as it seems I try, I am a crappy cook. I do not like the word crappy but find it in my vocabulary all too often, but when describing my cooking ability it really sums it up. As an example of my ability I will describe how today went. I summoned up the strength and will power to bake bread in this heat. The bread was looking good, after kneading it, it had risen beautifully gone into the oven, but when I finally heard the buzzer go off it was ruined. The tops were completely burnt. All that effort gone. I moved on to making dessert for our family night goodie, I totally misread the directions on how to layer the brownie recipe, even though I had literally read the directions several times that day. I am like a person who reads books on how to travel to foreign countries, but never leaves the country. I read recipes for fun but hardly ever do I execute those recipes. While I was morning the misread directions for dessert I managed to ruin dinner, it wasn't even a real dinner, I made spaghetti and burnt the sauce. I can't describe how many times I forget to add an egg, salt, put in baking soda instead of baking powder, you name it and I do it regularly. Despite all my follies Benjamin always says, "Good meal mama." He even added I like the sauce tonight. Are you kidding me it tasted like bad leftovers and it just came off the stove!!!! Sadly even if I didn't have little hands tugging at my skirt and asking me to open the glue bottle, I would still get distracted. I really don't enjoy cooking so lately I have been trying to make new things hoping that maybe it is because it becomes so mundane, but I have found most of these new recipes have the same problem, the cook. My only comfort is that I am preparing my sons to cleave unto their wives, cause they will praise their future wives for their cooking when reflecting on how there mother cooked. Man I am so self sacrificing...

Fast - Powerful - Vicious

Fast- Powerful- Vicious, the description of a barracuda.

The last meet of the season was a complete success. All the swimmers did every stroke, and did them well I might add. Liv did backstroke her least favorite stroke, she conquered her fear it was an awesome sight. Bella killed in Butterfly and continues to glide across the pool in backstroke, she finishes so fast she literally watches half the race from the other side of the pool (what can I say I am a proud mama). Our little team cheered everyone on, its been cool to watch the various age groups unite; I can't think of another sport where ages vary that much and they interact regularly enough to be friends.

The absolute highlight of the final meet was when Holman my four year swam the freestyle race. I had given him a goal or an incentive ( a bribe is when you are in the heat of the moment and are trying at all costs to have your child behave on demand) of a Transformer if he raced in the meet. He kept saying he couldn't, Benjamin kept telling him to say you don't want to, not that you can't because we know you can. Saturday morning came and he was determined not to compete. When the meet started he was chilling in his camping chair and cheering for his sisters. After the first event butterfly he turned to Benjamin and said, "I think I should go get my swimsuit." With two sets of Grandparents that have pools and swim team everyday we always have swimsuits in the car. Benjamin got the suit and he waited for the freestyle event. We kept telling him that he could have the outside lane closest to the wall, that we would be right there. Well another little boy really wanted that lane and was camping out there before the girls even raced (girls always go first). He had to pick a new lane, he was shaken but resolute. He was worried because he doesn't know how to dive, but i told him he could jump. The buzzer sounded and he went for it. Benjamin and I were holding our breath. But that little boy didn't stop once to hang onto the lane lines, he just kept trucking. When he was almost at the end he started to swim to the other lane that had the latter to exit the pool, but luckily he could hear us screaming to touch the wall. When i grabbed him out of the pool the timer was asking me his name I could barely answer i was all choked up over his performance. Holman was awesome! On the video it is fun to note Benjamin yelling at me to get to the other side of the pool to greet Holman, of course I would be there to meet him, I guess we all had nervous energy :) On the ride home Bella turns to me and says mom I prayed twice for Holman today that he would have the courage to do it, and he did.



The next video is of Olivia and Bella swimming side by side in Butterfly. I would like to point out Olivia's form. Her arms came completely out of the water and stretched out in front of her, her legs were together without scissor kicking (not all 8 and unders get the form, this is where I become a PE nazi, I guess).




The next video is of Bella and Olivia doing backstroke, go barracudas!




The meet ended with the kids doing relay races with giant inter tubes, they had a blast, I was tempted to run to the car and grab my swimsuit to join them. The season is over so now we can sleep in.... yeah right not with my kids.















Parkin wants to join the team for next year, he's working out.

Cheaper by the Coach

This memorable quote from one of my kids favorite movies "Cheaper by the Dozen" is what I am living right now......

Hank: It's gettin' so as I can hardly go out in public any more. I mean, really, between the autograph hounds and the paparazzi...
Kate: Autographs and everything? I mean, just the one commercial, and you have paparazzi?
Hank: Yeah. I've never actually seen them, but, you know, they hide in the bush and... they get their shot.

Click the link and you will understand!

Howe works to create Benson swim team

Kit Kat Wins Sorta

Today we had our sonogram appointment. I asked the girls what their favorite candy bar was and they came to a consensus that kit Kat was their favorite. I asked the boys (well just Holman) what candy bar he liked the best it was a pretty big toss up between M&M and Reese's, finally he went with M&M. Which ever sex the baby was the winning team got to distribute the winning candy bar. Our little baby is a shy one, back towards my tummy and legs crossed. So the doctor only gave us an 80% likelihood of the baby being a girl. I thought about eating one stick of each of the kids candy but that would symbolize 75% not 80%. My sister Lindsey said with a percentage as unsure as that she doesn't feel we should share, well we did and have. Next month the doctor will do another sonogram and hopefully she will cooperator better. Our baby guru ( Penny Hardt) has predicted all four of our kids correctly and she said girl, so girl it probably is. 20 more weeks till the end of this race and we shall know for sure.

Cowboy Up!

A Benson phrase that we have picked up that we love is Cowboy Up. When there is a job to be done that nobody wants to do its "Cowboy Up." It's similar to one of my favorite phrases "Bear Down" and not as crass as "Suck it up."

When I asked the kids to collect the eggs there was a lot of shifting responsibility. Quietly Holman got up went to his room and "got suited up" for his rodeo. He Cowboyed Up, put on his armor and walked out to the pen. He doesn't like his feet getting pecked at so he made sure to put on his sisters heels. We love our warrior!




Parkin is looking on very impressed with his big brother. Man those chicks look afraid.....

New York and DC with my fabulous sisters

The lady herself.












Central Park with two cute tourists :)














We always take pictures of our feet.....why?











Arlington was awesome specially on Sunday, there is a special feeling there.


















Who is that other girl in the photo, she is taking away from my moment with Honest Abe!
















I love my sisters! We had such a great time, up till 2:00 am every night, we were all exhausted but didn't want to waste a moment. Next time maybe Oprah or Finland :)

Puppy Parkin

I love this boy, he brings me so much joy. He truly is a puppy, who doesn't love a puppy?!

Living on the upside of down

The downside is that my 2 year old is not potty trained. I had begun the process about a week and half before we moved to our new place, that way all the accidents could occur at the land/trailer. He was doing pretty well until the Father Son camp out. I do not blame Benjamin for wanting to put him in diapers for the camp out, but you can't go back and truth be told he was doing ok, not great. Back to diapers, sigh. But the upside is my darling daughters have taken to changing his diapers, in fact I think they enjoy the challenge. Bella always says, "Man I should be on Dirty Jobs for this." Whatever gets her through.

My second thing to note this week is about frugality. Wanting to keep some of the skills I have learned on our extended "camp out" I decided that I didn't need a dryer. Our friends gave us their old washing machine, and our old set is back at our rental, so all we were missing was the drying machine. I thought hey I don't need a dryer, I don't need to waste the money, when I have a perfectly good hot sun that zaps moisture in seconds. So alas I went without, I purchased a drying rack for outside. There are two reasons why people back in the day did not use drying machines: 1) they were not invented 2) they only had one day outfit and one Sunday best. Maybe I should just pare down the amount of clothes we have to two outfits a piece, then I think I could handle the line drying, but we don't. The kids need to change five times a day and dirty each piece of clothing, right? Maybe if it were just Benjamin and I, I could handle it. But distractions happen and rather than chucking the wet clothes immediately in the dryer I think oh shoot I have to hang each piece and oh wait Parkin has the jam and is spreading it on the floor. I get to distracted by my lack of desire to hang the clothes and trying to make sure the house doesn't get burned down. Bottom line I am in the market for a nice used drying machine, bless this modern world.


This picture is shows an easy load just towels!

Benson Barracuda's

Suzie and I had been driving our kids into Tucson every day for swim team. It is a long drive for a sport, but this is southern Arizona in summertime, if your kids aren't swimming what else are they doing for exercise? You can't very well send them out to play a game of soccer when the heat is in the 90's (ahh Benson is at least 5 -7 degrees cooler than Tucson, let me tell you it does make a difference!). We had hopes of starting a swim team in Benson next season when we could learn more about the surrounding communities swim team league. I had made a serendipitous call to the Cove in Sierra Vista to find out who they competed against, I was shocked when they listed Benson as one of the swim teams. I then called up the city of Benson to find out about this team that never was listed or advertised. The lady in charge said they were trying to start up a team but nobody had done a swim team before and weren't sure how to start. I asked her what she needed , a coach, and swimmers. Done. Between Scott and Suzie's 5 swimmers and our 2 we had seven willing kids to start the Benson team. Suzie's and my goal was to have a least one other kid who was not a Howe on the team. We accomplished it, there are about 13 kids on the team and we are hoping our numbers will grow when word gets out. The city of Benson's pool is 25 yards so smaller than competition sized pools (25 meters), but there are plenty of private leagues in Tucson that use that size pool. Unfortunatly the pool doesn't have lane lines or hooks in the pool to string lane lines, but after brainstorming with my Father and sister Hillary we came up with a plan. We got pier blocks, rope and fun noodles strung them together and voila, lane lines. It's been a lot of fun starting the program, the kids love that their Mom is the coach, and it is great that we have Scott and Suzie's teenagers to help out (and score points) for our little team. The meet was awesome we had several top places. The first video is of Bella doing her thing in backstroke, she got first place, not that it maters ;) The second video is of Olivia, Sydney and Bella swimming free style. Bella and Sydney continue to touch the wall simultaneously as 1st and 2nd. Olivia is in the far lane plugging along like a champ, we are so proud of her, bless her for being born in a swimming family. She will learn to love it, yes she will :)

Our New Castle

I am living in my dream house! No our house has not been built. We have decided to rent a place (or rather i encouraged Benjamin). There was no way i could endure the summer with four children in a small travel trailer. At Least during the school year the girls could escape, I mean go to school, and the boys and I could have a little more elbow room, but the summer would have been too much. I know my limitations and I had passed them.

So what is this dream house..... A double wide! We now not only have one bathroom but two! The master bathroom even has a garden tub to boot! No more port-a-potty...... It is grand! There is a boys room and a girls room and an awesome wood paneled kitchen, oh yeah! But the laundry room is my personal favorite. Having used a laundry mat for ten months, it is so nice to pop in a load at will. It sits on an acre with mature mesquites and a fenced yard, a must for my escapee Parkin. It is amazing how when you go with out how appreciative you become ( I know their are people who have lived in worse, I can empathize on my own scale). So here is a list of forgotten comforts.

10. A sink large enough to wash dishes without flooding anything.
9. One step better a dishwasher!
8. Room for everyone of my kids to have a bed (instead of 6 people to three beds).
7. A normal size fridge!
6. Room for toys indoors.
5. A vacuum. My favorite chore, little effort with amazing results.
4. Couches!
3. Elbow room at the dining table, a dinning table.
2. bedroom doors
1. Indoor toilets, did you have any doubt that wouldn't be number one!

We are at this rental for a year and the way things are looking with the bank, our future build is uncertain to say the least...... My new phrase has been, "The lord giveth the Lord taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord." We may not get our "dream house" but for right now I am so grateful for the comforts we are enjoying.

I thought of putting in pictures, but I thought it best for your mind to imagine how cool the house is, because its just so great!

Bella's Baptism

I can't believe I haven't blogged about this yet. Thanks to Kim for posting about Kaylee's she reminded me to do it :) Crystal too is on the ball with writing about her son, I will get there.

It was so neat to have family and friends come down for the special day. Bella has been waiting for this day for a year. Benjamin and I have also been doing last minute cramming making sure Bella remembers everything that she has learned. First and foremost that after baptism she can always repent when she does something she knows is not right, and that those mistakes can be forgiven too. What a comfort that it doesn't have to last only a day.

Bella was baptised in the dress that I was baptised in and she and I made the dress she wore afterwards.

After the baptism we went over to Kartchner ponds for a barbecue, and thanks to cousin Madison a swim too. She went in the water and started the trend. The kids had a blast.

Mothers note to Bella:

Bella we love you so very much! You are the perfect older sister, always lovingly helping your younger siblings who adore you and you genuinely adore them too! Thanks so much for being an awesome example of always looking on the sunny side of life, your attitude is contagious! Keep up the great job we have all the confidence in you! XXXXOOOO

Tie Breaker

We thought that given this stage in our life it was a perfect time to have a baby. Why not we have such luxurious living conditions, three beds for six people, a port-a-potty conveniently located near our trailer and now running water. Heck a friend gave me a washing machine so I can do my laundry one load at a time right here on the property. Life couldn't be more stress free.


We are calling the baby our tie breaker. Right now we have an even number of boys to girls. So we will see which camp gets a new member. The tie breaker will join us late November or on Holman's birthday December 1st. On June 22nd if our little guy (yes I think it is a boy) is corroperating we will find out exactly who is "winning". Surprisingly that doesn't seem to far off to me.


I am just so thankful that the house is going to be completed by the end of November. Thank goodness who wants three to a bed anyway?

The answer is blowing in the wind

Goodbye tent, hello 55mph winds.

The winds have been getting stronger lately so we knew this was going to happen especially since the wind ripped the giant hole in the tent as seen in the picture.

Luckily we have cleared most of our items out like our couches, piano and all our clothing. We now have a new dressing chamber, that doesn't, at lest not yet, blow in the wind.

Goodbye tent, you made for such fun stories. I will not miss the smell you gave my clothes though.

Monkey See Monkey Do

It's official, Parkin has learned how to climb the playhouse and now he can sit on the roof just like his brother and sisters. He was very proud of himself as shown by him lifting up his shirt to show his belly, a gesture that he does when he thinks he should be rewarded. We of course tickle it, who could resist an open belly. The dismount I am told was quite eventful, Benjamin couldn't stop laughing,.

Better Than Fiction

In the early morning I woke up to a terrible nightmare. The kind that you can't go to sleep afterwards. I tried everything, sing a song, say a prayer, no relief to my suffering. I am so sick of dreaming, I hate the chases, the foreign lands, the spy's the old friends from elementary school and all other random things my mind comes up with. I will gladly trade the ability to fly for just a dreamless sleep.

Anyways because of the nightmare my day did not start off well. It didn't help matters that I remembered that Olivia was in charge of snack for her class (why do they need snacks again?). Now I not only need to make sure the girls are dressed the boys must be semi dressed as well, to go shopping to get the snack before school. Parkin never did make it out of his PJ's. Anyways I needed to do my laundry so I was racing to get that all ready to go. We make it to walmart, get the snacks for both girls (bella has it later this month, 2nd grade has snack rotation !) we check out and thats when I realize I left my debit card at home, so I can't get cash back, which i need to exchange for quarters at the laundry mat. I drop the girls off at school drive all the way home again and pick up my debit card. I have to go back to the walmart to get some random item so I can get cash back. We make it to the laundry mat and i drop the boys off inside and go back for the clothes baskets. I try to carry everything at once, and that's when my laundry soap hit the pavement and crushed the cap, spilling over half of the already low level laundry soap. I get all the loads started and have to guess with how much soap to use. Meanwhile the boys and I go back to the car to watch a show on our dvd player. Finally the washing is done. I start to put the clothes into baskets to transfer to the dryer and in walks a lady with a bunch of wet clothes in baskets and she proceeds to fill the remaining available dryers. ARRRG. So I wait for other dryers to become available..... Meanwhile a lady starts smoking outside, close to our open window movie theatre. I reach for the keys to role up the windows so we can role down the other side windows , only to realize I can't find the keys. Twenty minute late after I have gone through two trash cans ( because I always clean out the car while we are waiting) we find the keys on the back seat, giving the lady just enough time to smoke a pack and fill our car with her addiction. The dryers finally become available, the clothes dry, I start to fold them and I find Holman's PJ"S that he had peed the night before. I hold them close to feel the warm and notice they smell like hot urine..... I guess the measuring cup for laundry soap is actually important.

After we leave the laundry mat the boys and I go to the Library to request new books because the ones we want are never there; I over hear the librarian complain that he is having a very off day. I bit my lip and thought amen brother, amen.

Sharks in Benson, they smell fear

About once a year I re-learn why you can't send a woman to do a man's job. What can I say I am a slow learner. Benjamin saw in town a sign that read "Have you gotten your oil changed for free today?" So naturally when he called from work to have me go check it out, I was leery. But the Yukon was in need of an oil change and i wanted to find a place in Benson I could go to and support the little town. I am not completely gullible, I did not think they would actually change my oil for free, but I did think that at the very least I would get a card to buy "four get the fifth free." Well when the boys and I were sitting in the lobby reading a Pooh Bear story in walks the repair man. "After looking over your car you need to replace your whodawhata for 35 dollars as well as your thingamabob for another 35. Also your chunkochange needs to be replaced for 110 dollars." Then he shows me the air filter from my car and says this is very dirty and recommends that it be replaced for 20 dollars. I think to myself are you kidding me I run a vacuum cleaner filter into the ground and it looks a whole lot worse before I bang it clean. What am I suppose to say, put it back. So I tell the man I need to call my husband because he is the car guy. Which I am sure he knows when he saw the fresh meat walking through the door. I try to recount to Benjamin all the jive that man was spinning at me, Benjamin tells me just get the oil changed and air filter and then we will take it to Jen's dad (thank goodness there are honest car mechanics). Well the price of the oil change plus filter still came to 70 dollars, ouch. I know it could have been worse by almost 200. And as for the "free oil change" my name gets entered to win a free oil change, they pick one weekly. Yeah sure you do.......

Cake Coincidence

Today the boys and I were grocery shopping at the Mart, Walmart that is, and I asked Holman to help pick out our treat for Family Night. Every Monday evening the kids get to pick a dessert of their choice, and Holman I think likes chocolate just as much as any woman does, so I wasn't too surprised about his choice. We had only bought this kind of cake once before.

Today was the day we had the Pima County inspector coming to inspect our electrical and water pumping station. We were quite nervous about the re-visit since he had failed both sites before. There were a couple of things that he could get technical about if he wanted to, so it definitely wasn't a gimme that it would all work out.

Well we passed! Could it be that the inspector was in such a good mood because the Cats are going to the sweet 16? Or is a more likely scenario that the chocolate cake that brought us luck in the past ( remember the awesome eclectic company man who gave us power, despite our failing mark) is truly some type of good luck edible charm. When we picked out the cake I forgot all about the inspector coming, it truly was a coincidence. I think somewhere in my subconscious I knew that the cake must be purchased. I was talking to my friend Sarah Allred yesterday about such serendipity with the electric man, so maybe that too helped me to buy the cake.

Yesterday I gave a talk on overcoming disappointments and finding hope, in jest I mentioned that while riding the storm out, a little chocolate always makes it better. Who knows the true power of the coco bean?......

Two Idaho men make 60 trips around the Sun!

This is a shout out to my father and father in law who turned 60 this year! Both of them managed to survive their youth despite their many trips to the dump and lighting various things on fire. It's funny they both grew up in Idaho but in separate towns, but in many aspects they are very similar, maybe it says more about the spud state. A couple of months ago Ron impressed the Howe family with being able to sing the Idaho state song, so naturally I wanted to see if my Dad was up top par, and of course that guy was! He too was able to recite all the lyrics. Both these men had crazy sidekicks that followed (or lead) them into trouble. My Dad's was David Long, Ron's was Bucky Nelson, oh these two can tell a tale. Both of these men are great handy men ( or at least produced a son who is, yeah Benjamin!). Both are awesome Fathers and love their grand kids who adore them. Both have been married to their wives (Yeah Joyce and Barbara) for over 38 years!





My Dad turned 60 in January, Hillary flew in from DC and Lindsey drove form Utah, John and I trekked in too, although at not such great a distance, we surprised him at the Mesa Temple with mom. It was great fun!







We are celebrating Ron's birthday on Sunday with the Howe's famous desserts. Today is his actual Birthday! So Happy Birthday!This is a picture of Ron getting his toes painted at one of Bella's birthday party's what a real man!





So here's to another 60 trips around the Sun ( well as long as your bladder, eyesight, hearing, joint. limbs, mind are still intact).

Treading Water

Time has not stopped, but we have not progressed! We are now squatting at Scott and Suzie's rental in Benson, and for the moment are enjoying the modern day comforts that now are quite meaningful, instant hot water (who cares about the dishwasher), toilets that flush, regular soap not hand sanitizer, a waching machine......aah the living. But none the less it is not ours nor is it permanent, thus treading water. Eventually the plans will get through the county and we will start the build, eventually. When asked by a friend how things were going I said , "good we are treading water, not moving backward, not moving forward, not sinking, just treading". She said, "good that means your building muscle." Love that thought. I want toned arms not body builder arms, just toned. So hopefully we can start building soon, or I will be awesome at arm wrestling.

Never say never

After 6 months of living without electricity we finally were able to proceed with getting temporary power. When we were applying for a construction loan they told us not to do any improvements on the land i.e. electricity until we closed. The loan process started in August and we finally closed in November. So those four months we had to sit on our hands and not improve anything (even if we were going to pay out of pocket). Then in December we were not sure if we should just wait till we got our house permits and just get our permanent electric line in and not waist the money for the temporary line. Well getting all the permits in order has taken longer than expected. Oh, the red tape. Getting trenches dug, Benjamin and Scott setting up our electric box and pedestal, all that stuff takes time. But with Suzie's little Franklin being born 10 weeks early our need for temporary power seemed eminent. We decided that the extra cost would be worth it to receive temporary power (it ended up being less then 500 dollars, are you kidding me!).

Finally the day arrived Monday January 26, the county inspector would come to see our set up and see if it met the code. If it made code he would then "green tag" it. Once it is green tagged then the power company comes out and puts all the power lines in and juices it up. The power company was scheduled to come the very next day to set the lines and turn it all on. But.......... we didn't get green tagged. The inspector came (or as I like to call him the dream crusher) and he failed us. We would not be getting power. Six months we have lived with out. Six months. SIX MONTHS.

I was devastated. I woke up on Tuesday knowing this was the day we were suppose to get power but wouldn't. I was really getting pruney in my sadness. I was shopping with the boys and Holman says to me"Mom will we ever get power?" I turned to him and said, "no son we will never get power." I bought a chocolate cake from walmart and took it home.

When we got home from our shopping trip I called the power company told them we weren't green tagged and almost cried on the phone, they asked when we would be able to be green tagged and I said, it would probably be another month until we could get all the stuff done that we needed to. I explained that I didn't want a worker to drive all the way out here only to find out that we weren't tagged to go ahead. Then at 1 in the afternoon a worker shows up. I apologized to him for not getting the message and for waisting his time. He said he got the message and was just going to place all the wire and get it set up, and that he would come back to turn it on once it is green tagged. Then he says, "How long till you get green tagged"......I nearly cry again as I tell him my woes. He smiled and said "Oh".

I picked up the kids from the bus we all crammed in my trailer and I pulled out the cake and we ate to our mediocrity.

At five thirty when I was making dinner I hear the workers telling me they are leaving. I thank them for coming and as he is leaving he says, "mam, you got power now, just run an electric cord to the outlet by the pedestal." I say, "but won't you get in trouble?" He turns to leave and shrugs his shoulders and says, "maybe." Love that man! The kids were so excited and asked but how mom how did we get it? I told them that the man saw a damsel in distress and decided to become a hero. Never say never!