Going Radical! First Month!

2014 is the year of the Radical! We are big Dave Ramsey fans, he is a financial adviser that specializes in helping motivate people to get out of debt. He has a 7 step path to financial freedom. The first step is establish an emergency fund of $1,000 dollars. Step two is snowball your debt. Start with the lowest debt no matter the interest rate pay if off then take the amount you were paying to that debt and apply it to the next debt "snowball" that amount until that sucker picks up steam and rolls all the way down hill to knock out you last debt. Going radical means that you are willing to sacrifice wants and sometimes needs (amazing how needs have a way of diminishing) to fulfill your greatest desire to get out of debt!

We have no credit card debt, no car loans, no Christmas or vacation debt. We do have land debt ( when we sold our land in Benson we had to sell it at a loss, we took out a loan from our 401K to pay the difference, ouch!) We have a student loan (Benjamin had been working full time in college but that last year he needed to not be distracted with juggling both full time jobs so we took a loan to pay for our living expenses while he finished up). Lastly the true beast our home equity loan ( this is what we used to pay the permit fees for said land, put in a well, dig trenches for said well, trenches for electrical lines, inspection fees, clearing of land for home site, architect fees, county fees, paying off a car etc) this little loan is the monkey nay the gorilla on our back.

Before 2014 I had been preparing the kids for a change in life style. Not that we have been extravagant in the past, but we did occasionally eat out, we always had big birthday parties and went on family trips a couple of times a year. This would all change.

Going radical means cash flowing everything. Every dollar has a name. I have three envelopes 1) grocery money 2) gas money 3) money left over after paying bills that is not going to be applied to the debt. Once these envelopes are empty, spending ceases till next paycheck.  In the past I have done this but I have often cheated dipping into my checking account with my debit card. This will not happen in the year of the radical!

Well we have finished our first month and I have learned some valuable lessons, not in a particular order:

1) A couple must be united in this approach, when one is weak the other must be strong! When all you want to do is order pizza but the cash allotted for that is gone, one must say not in the budget lets make pancakes instead.

2) Its a family affair but kids lack the perspective that adults have gained over the years. This can be very challenging when they want something but it is not in the budget. Guilt can be very hard, one must constantly visualize the feeling of being debt free. And pray for strength!

3) Pay your tithing! Dave Ramsey is an Evangelical Christian he also believes in paying 10 percent of ones income. Before he learned sound budgeting he had learned the hard way how to control his budget. He and his wife had to file for bankruptcy even during that time he paid his tithing. Because tithing isn't about the money. God is God he does not need money. Heavenly Father wants to develop in us a willing/grateful heart (among other things) and paying tithing does this. When you allow yourself to be a giver He can than "open up the windows of heaven and pour out a blessing on you."

4) Windows are WIDE open! In order to cash flow my daughters braces I needed a certain amount of preschool tuition to be paid in full (they get a discount by doing so) and it was! We were even able to pay off our land loan in January, five months early!

5) When you show self control, Heavenly Father shows you His control of the entire universe. He truly will bless your righteous desires. In the past  we would have celebrated this big event with a specific cake from Costco, a chocolate bundt cake (http://www.howelesismore.blogspot.com/2009/01/never-say-never.html).  I told the kids we paid off the land on Wednesday January 29 and they instantly said lets go buy a cake. But sticking to our envelops plan I knew the money still in the envelops was designated for something else. They were of course really let down but  I was determined, but sad see #2. Benjamin goes to church with Dieter for a special youth night for the young men. At the end of the evening he comes home and says you are never going to believe what I got at church tonight he then shows me the exact bundt cake from Costco! Dieter said this is a true radical cake, free! Benjamin said the stake young men's president said we had an extra cake and thought your family would like it. Are your kidding me!!! Benjamin said to add to this tender mercy was the fact that the youth activity's theme was Heavenly Father knows each of us individually! Heavenly father knew we had a righteous goal of getting out of debt, he knew what we normally would have celebrated with and he new who had an extra one.  See lesson #4!

Boom baby onto month number 2!

Benjamin turns 37!

Benjamin turned 37! All this man wanted for his birthday was pizza, homemade sugar cookies, and to watch the Cats play. Well, he got a lot more! The girls made him this awesome photo collage of the family, Parkin took a sharpie to a plastic baseball bat and decorated it for him, and Holman carved a key out of soap with his pocket knife. I bought him conversation hearts 3 bags I might add, we went to see the Saratov Approach with friends and we went out afterwards to one of his favorite restaurants, Claim Jumper. Our friends gave him a DQ card, what a lucky guy he is! I was super sad that the Cats lost, they really could have brought home the the perfect birthday for my hubs, he took the loss pretty well though :)

One of Benjamin's best qualities is his excitement for things, he loves his birthday, any celebration really. He does the countdown and gets everybody fired up. It is really endearing :) He knows how to play. I couldn't find him on Friday night I went to the front yard and there he was playing a game of soccer with our kids and some of the neighborhood kids. He is the fun Dad. At the park he helps organize the games that every kid wants to be in on. He is a good provider, he often gets awards for going above and beyond and being a team leader who is recognized for getting along with people who can be difficult. He actively tries his best at being Bishop, I am not gonna lie it can be challenging (at least for me and the kids) but he wouldn't change a thing in being able to see the power of the atonement in peoples lives. And dang he is good-looking, yep I think I will keep him around for another 37!

Ear piercing time!

My baby girl is old enough to put holes in her head, specifically her ears! Olivia turned 11 so by our family tradition that means she can get her ears pierced. We made a day of it, we woke up early went out to breakfast with Bella and Nana. It was a great ladies breakfast complete with hot coco and little goodies. We made our way over to the mall to Claire's Boutique. Olivia chose the largest looking diamonds for her studs. Sounds like Olivia, right. She was apprehensive and even chose to hold the "Claire bear" don't worry she feels no shame. Of course after the first shot the next one was no big deal, way easier than a shot.

Olivia has started Junior High this year. She is a beautiful, talented and a very smart young woman. She is tall and I often forget that she is not older. She is kind, often reaching out to kids who have disabilities. She forgives freely. When someone is unkind to her she says its ok and gives them the benefit of the doubt.she has as close to a photographic memory that I have ever seen, she can read something once and can recall dates and info, thus lending herself to being an excellent student. To add to her maturity this year she got braces this week, now she is an official pre-teen :)

we love you Liv, sou make us laugh with your quick wit! She often has strangers laughing when they catch an unexpected political reference or pop culture comment. Liv you are our family's spice we are forever grateful for your amazing flavor! Love you for forever and a day!

H-man turns 9!

Holman is our shy good looking man. He is kind and very smart and really funny when there is a familiar group. He changed schools this year which I was really worried about because he is so shy and resists change. But he prayed about it and I gave him the option of where to go. He felt impressed that he should change and he has done wonderfully. We through a party for him but it was very last minute and we asked Holman if he would like to have a party or would he like us to buy Super Mario Brothers wii game. He chose the party. He invited a friend from his old school (Kau), a friend form his new school (Katelyn), his cousin (Kate) and and his neighbor (Derek) to join us to go to the movies. We saw Frozen which luckily the boys enjoyed. The movie was very cute. Later we came back for pizza. The kids all had a great time. But to his great luck one of his friends bought the Mario game for him! So he felt like he had a win win!

Son I love you so much! I love your sincerity and your helpfulness. I love that you are such a great big brother often steering your younger siblings away from danger. You are such an amazing young man and can't wait to see what man you will grow into!

Adrianna's tea party

Adrianna turned 4! We celebrated by having a tea party with some of her preschool pals. The whole table was pinked out! We had little sandwiches and little cakes and cookies. It was real fun, complete with the birthday girl having a meltdown! We love this little lady. She is our youngest and I really worried about not having a younger sibling to be her buddy. I have learned that every family needs a youngest and she is ours. She is so independent, she loves people but also loves alone play (this is probably very true since her mother has three preschool classes a week). She is sweet and loves to be a cuddle kitten. Much like a cat she gives affection only when she wants to, so when it is displayed it is from the heart and willingly. We love you very much you are our angel, our strong willed, beautiful girl!

Birthday Surprise

In late May we had a young man move into our ward. Our family notice this handsome guy instantly and asked Benjamin for details. He said his name was Dieter and was 17 and living on his own through a CPS program. Benajmin said he was a really nice and respectful young man so I said invite him over for dinner. We all liked him so much we kept inviting him over and we fell in love with him. Tragedy hit and his twin brother, who was also living independently through the same CPS program but in Prescott, died suddenly. We got to have Dieter stay at our house for a couple of days as he grieved and we traveled up for the funeral. After that we thought, hey we should have this guy move in, he is already a part of our family! So when he turned 18 in November we opened up our crazy Howe home for one more. He is great, hardworking, quite, thoughtful and respectful. He is a senior a will be graduating in May. So his life is wide open. We can't our family lucky to have him in our home and we documented this by having a family photo.

For his birthday we had a surprise party. We invited all the youth form our congregation for the party. We played minute to win it games. We had a great time, unfortunately Dieter was sick and had to leave the party early. Even thought he party ended early hopefully he understood how much is arrival has meant for us and the congregation, he has taught us a lot and hopefully he will for months to come.

unintentional social experiment

I teach 38 preschool students in 3 separate classes. I have four classroom rules: 1) Be kind 2) Be safe 3) Be a listener 4) Be the best you can be! This year I changed my reward system for good behavior. Instead of rewarding individuals for good classroom behavior I decided to reward the class for individual behavior. I did this by having a series of colorful balls in a large jar, when a student did something noteworthy I would remove a colorful ball from a large jar and put it in the smaller individual classroom jars. When these small jars were full of individual student acts the entire class would get a treasure chest item. I thought this new way would motivate the class and eliminate the animosity when one child gets rewarded and others do not. I thought the parents would be happier, in years passed I would often get questions about the treasure chest chart and how their kids were doing. When my son Holman was in preschool I remember wondering how many treasure chest items he individually received in relation to the other students. I thought this was the answer! Boy was I wrong!  I learned 3 valuable lessons.

1) When a collective group gets rewarded for an individual effort the motivation from the individual diminishes. Why try when an individual effort is just a collective drop in a very large bucket. Because I was rewarding on a group effort the reward needed to take longer to achieve than if it was a small goal.

2) Students that struggled with following direction were not motivated to change because "johnny" earned a ball, they did not think thanks Johnny for helping the team. His actions were not appreciated or even really noticed.

3) The last lesson I learned was when switching back to individual reward for individual efforts (a student does something noteworthy they get a star next to their name when they get 5 stars they get to choose from the treasure chest), the change in behavior is FAST!  The class as a whole is acting much better! Even kids who have struggled have been doing so much better.

Bottom line direct consequences for individual choices benefits the individual which directly effect the group!